ET in China

There is an International Tourism trade fare happening in Beijing at the moment at which East Timor is strongly represented by Government and private sector types. For details of this event please check out this address.

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Dili Airport

In the past week I have had to use the airport twice. I have to say it’s a bloody disgrace. I was on a flight to Bali last Wednesday and arrived at the airport with about one-and-a-half hours to spare. There is now nowhere to sit outside, the little café is closed down and the toilets are like an open sewer. Upon checking in and going through to the departure lounge, after being told that if I was a diplomat I wouldn’t have to go through any security checks, I found that I couldn’t even buy a small bottle of water. Duty free booze is on sale but you are not allowed to open it in the airport.
Upon returning from Bali the arrivals procedure is just as bad. In ‘baggage reclaim’ I counted 16 trolleys for more than 100 passengers. There are no fans or air conditioning and one small old guy was unloading 4 trailers of luggage.
This airport is the first/last sight most visitors have of East Timor. It used to be quaint and a bit of a ‘people watching’ place around lunchtime each day. Good espresso, people arriving/departing, somewhere to sit. The airport manager (if there is one) should be given a kick up the jacksie and then sacked.
There, that got that off my chest.

You Had To Be There

Overheard in the pub tonight during an Aussie rules football game on the TV. One of the patrons was getting quite upset:

Patron: Oh no, he manhandled him, come on referee, f**king hell!

Barman: What do you mean he 'manhandled' him? It's a f**king man's game. Did you want him to touch his rectum?

Patron: I hear Melbourne do that....

It made me laugh.

Mad Swiss - Part 2

Below is a picture of the Swiss couple, Emil and Liliana Schmid, who are travelling the world. On Wednesday 31st May they met with Sr. Miguel Lobato (pictured on the right), Government Director of Tourism. Also pictured is their car, which you have probably seen driving very slowly around town recently.
They have just returned from the east of the country and have now headed for the middle and the south.
You can also get more information on their odyssey

here (web site)

and

here (Guinness Book of Records)

Emil and Liliana Schmid with Sr. Miguel Lobato, Director of Tourism (r)

The vehicle, a Toyota LandcruiserFJ60, built in 1982

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Job Going

The following is an edited version of a job advertisement which appeared in today’s Timor Post:

AUSTRALIAN EMBASSY DILI
The Australian Embassy in Dili is seeking applications from Timorese nationals for the position of Training Officer and interpreter working within the Office of the Australian Defence Cooperation Programme. This is a long-term, full-time position.

The main duties of the position are:
- Conduct research on issued related to Timor – Australia Defence cooperation, including
provision of media monitoring.
- Conduct liaison between the Australian Defence Cooperation Program and F-FDTL including
the ability to work directly with both agencies.
- Liaise with the Timorese Ministry of Defence and other Government organisations on bilateral
Defence matters.

Essential requirements for the position:
- Fluency in spoken and written English and Tetum languages
- Knowledge of Timor’s and Australia’s defence systems.
- Initiative, astuteness and strong analytical skills.
- Ability to work well in a team and to be flexible and adaptable.
- Relevant experience in similar positions or fields.

Highly desirable attributes:
- Well-developed and proven organisational skills.
- Knowledge of Australia and Australia’s involvement in East Timor.

THE AUSTRALIAN EMBASSY IS AN EQUAL OPPORTUNITY EMPLOYER.

Now, I don’t know about you, but the most qualified person I can think of is pictured below:





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Random Stuff

Aussie sayings I really like:
“He’s got a face like a dropped pie”.
“Well, that went down like a wrought iron hang-glider.”

Things said on my verandah in the past week
“I feel like making a ricey mixture thing”.......
“That’s called a risotto in every other language”. err, only in Italian I think.

“I must have lots of eggs in case I have to make an emergency quiche”

Dili Directions:
You go past ‘Rubbish Ridge’
Cross over ‘Pig Bridge’
Where ‘Hello Mr.’ used to be.
Where the ‘dead cow’ used to be
The old New Resende
Where the market used to be (could be anywhere)
Where the old Dili club used to be
Where the new Dili club is
Past Ramos Horta’s house
The old Poy Chalor
Kiwi lines on the right, the old Makota on the left
Past the Jardine/Airport/Arte Moris (insert name here) IDP camp

Musings:
This country has one of the highest unemployment rates in the world.
Why do we have so many holidays? And from what?

Do white Pajero’s with tinted windows and no licence plates make you as nervous as they do me?

Why is it that when you are in this country you want to grab it by the shoulder and give it a good hard shake and yet when you are out of it you want to get back as quickly as possible?

Nice People To Meet

There are a couple of people in East Timor at the moment who, if you get the chance, you should try and meet and maybe buy them a couple of beers.
Their names are Emil and Liliana Schmid and they are doing a pretty amazing thing. They have been travelling the world in a Toyota Landcruiser since October 1984 and have so far have visited 156 countries with ET being the 156th. They have been in the past 10 issues of the Guinness Book of World Records. They are a couple ‘of a certain age’ who are financing their quest on their Swiss pensions (you couldn’t do it on a UK pension, but if you were an East Timorese MP you might be OK). Originally their journey was meant to be for 1 year only but obviously things got out of hand.
The other day they gave me a big list of facts and figures about their journey and some of them are quite incredible. For instance; they have had 161 flat tyres, used 132 spark plugs, the lowest average speed in any country was 10.0km/h in The Vatican. They have spent over USD 6000.00 on visas alone. Oh, and their 1 millionth driving minute was in Kupang, West Timor. (Yah boo sucks to Kupang, it should have been us).
The car is very unmissable. It is sky blue, has about 100 jerry cans strapped to the roof and comes equipped with Zurich licence plates.
As soon as I get a picture of the car I’ll post it here.
Talking of visitors to ET, Mr. Lonely Planet (South east Asia) is also in town. His name is Ryan Ver Berkmoes and he is also a very nice bloke. He is currently staying at the Hotel Dili but will be moving around a bit. Again, if you meet him, buy him a beer and tell him all about our beautiful country. He is a big amiable American chap and may even buy you a beer back…….