In today's (May 5th 2010) Timor-Leste newspapers the following Prime Ministrial edict appeared:
(please excuse the translation from Tetum)
Based on instructions from His Excellency Mr. Prime Minister and from the Ministry of Tourism, Commerce and Industry:
1. Bussiness's such as supermarkets, shops and kiosks, all of them in Dili, must participate in the general clean-up which takes place every week on Friday by cleaning the area in front of their place of business.
2. Starting today 3rd May 2010 all supermarkets, shops and kiosks in Dili have to paint and decorate with coloured fairy lights to commemmorate the restoration of independence on 20th May.
NB - Those who do not participate in the general clean-up and do not follow these instructions will be sanctioned by the withdrawal of their business licenses by the Ministry of Tourism, Commerce and Industry.
Signed and stamped by:
Fernando Da Silva,
National Director of Commerce.
What a bloody joke. This is what you fought for Falantil.
I wonder whose relatives have a coloured fairy lights and paint business?
....
Showing posts with label Living Here. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Living Here. Show all posts
Wednesday, 5 May 2010
Timor Telecon
So, here's what happened.
I woke up at 6am on Friday and thought I'd play a bit of 'Mafia Wars' on the old internet. Unfortunately the old internet decided that 6am was a bit early for it so I couldn't get on line. Eventually, at 7.15am I managed to get through to Timor Telecon 'customer support' (no, thats not an oxymoron (actually it is)) and was told that a 'technician' may show up in "around 3 days"! I was also given a complaint number. After explaining to the lady at 'customer support' that the problem was probably with the Timor Telecon main frame we said our goodbyes.
After 7 more 'phone calls to 'customer support' a 'technician' (and I use the term lightly) finally turned up at 5pm. This chap then proceeded to check all my connections, making sure that in a sudden frenzy I had not disconnected anything, added anything, taken away anything or had not deliberately fucked up my own internet. He then decided that maybe my problem was with the landline and he would call his office to check said Timor Telecon landline. Unfortunately the Timor Telecon technicians Timor Telecon telephone had a flat battery. So he used my landline to 'phone his office to check that my landline was working! Doh! After ascertaining that my landline was indeed working he told me that the problem was probably with the Timor Telecon main frame (yep) and he would go back and get it fixed. We parted on good terms considering that I was thinking of setting my dogs on him and all Timor Telecon employees and shareholders (especially the bloody shareholders).
After waiting what I thought was a reasonable time (1 hour) with still no internet I 'phoned 'customer support' again. I was again told that a 'technician' would arrive in 'around 3 days' again! Aaaaarrrrrgggggghhhhhhhhh! This on a Friday evening and Saturday and Sunday were not part of the 3 days.
So, later on the Friday evening I 'phoned 'customer support' again, mistakenly thinking that as it was a 24hour service they might not be so busy at that time of night and that I might get a bit more satisfaction. Wrong again. The wanker on the end of the line laughed at me and then hung up!
Monday morning, 1135am, and I was advised to buy an electricity stabilizer. So I did. Plugged it in. Still no internet. The 'technician' then told me the problem was probably with Timor poxy Telecon.
Maybe we will get it fixed today Mister. Fat chance.
Well, hush my mouth and slap my wrists. At 5.30pm the internet just magically reappeared and I was online. Hooray!
Fuck 'em though. I'm still posting this.
....
Wednesday, 18 November 2009
Whale Of A Time
The following pictures are of a Humpback whale cow and calf taken at Bob's Rock yesterday, 17th November at about 1pm. The calf kept breaching while mum kept a careful watch. Mum is the very large light blue object under the water.
I love it here
I love it here
....
Friday, 11 September 2009
OUR MATE
HENRY KOBYWhen Dili was hit by the 2006 crisis, many expats who had spent years and fortunes setting up businesses and making lives for themselves in this country watched in shock as Dili burned. Backpackers were still turning up as youths fought on the street outside the gates. These were strange days. One night Henry drove rioters away with a spade as they tried to climb the fence into the hostel. Even though he was greatly outnumbered, he roared defiance at the intruders. They fled. Henry could be fierce.
During this period, Henry found work as an electrical contractor at the Heliport, newly occupied by Australian forces. I met him one day as he cursed security guards at the Heliport as they would not allow him to enter to do his work because he didn’t have a pass because he was self-employed. Dili was full of people with passes dangling around their necks: police, army, NGO’s and aid workers, who had been shipped in to deal with the crisis. But we expat residents didn’t “belong” to an organization. We just belonged to Dili. We decided that we, too, needed an identity as a group, a pass. So Henry became the first member of the LCC – The Local Characters’ Club – open only to those foreigners who had arrived in Timor-Leste before independence, investing our own capital, without a safety-net . The LCC pass had a photo and an official-looking crest. It worked for Henry and he never had trouble getting access to the work site again when he flashed the pass. It was a joke, based on his quirky sense of humour, but there was actually an underlying seriousness to the bond between Local Characters, who numbered only 20 or so. One of the club’s rules was that all Local Characters should help any other member who was in trouble, regardless of whether they were on speaking terms or not. Henry was always there for us when we found ourselves in a predicament. He would grumble, suck his teeth, and pitch in to help.
Henry had a narrow escape in 2006 when he unwittingly rode into a gunfight on his motor bike. A bullet passed between his arm and his ribcage, punching a hole in his T-shirt and leaving just a graze. He often joked about it. When his final illness was diagnosed, and he returned to Dili after months of treatment, he had us laughing as he told anecdotes about his time in hospital and how he tormented the long-suffering nursing staff. He told us that his illness had brought him face to face with death and that he felt serene about the end, whenever it might come; he was ready. He had also gained a new appreciation of life, a sweetness, a gentleness of manner. In sharing these experiences, I believe that he was saying goodbye to us and trying to diminish the grief that we are all feeling now. He was shy, he didn’t like a fuss. He loved Timor-Leste deeply. He told us that he wanted to be here at the end and I am glad he was. He belonged here. But without Henry, Dili has lost some of its flavor. He will be missed and fondly remembered.
R.I.P. MATE
......
Thursday, 21 May 2009
Holier Than Thou?
Re: 'The Dili Insider'
And I quote
“Slander, idle gossip and unsubstantiated nonsense will be ignored”
Bloody hypocrite…
....
And I quote
“Slander, idle gossip and unsubstantiated nonsense will be ignored”
Bloody hypocrite…
....
Tuesday, 12 May 2009
Some Good News (at last)
Follow this link for more information:
Voters reject terror of Timor
Tom Allard, Jakarta
May 12, 2009
EURICO Guterres, the pro-integration militia leader who terrorised East Timor as it voted for independence, has failed to win a seat in Indonesia's Parliament.
Mr Guterres' failure to get the lucrative sinecure as West Timor's representative was confirmed at the weekend with the release of the final results of April's legislative elections.
"Because he is a famous figure, it was hard for him," said a member of Mr Guterres' campaign team, Hukman Reny, comparing him to Brazilian soccer player Ronaldinho.
"Just like Ronaldinho, whenever he plays, all the backs try to stop him scoring," he said.
With his long hair, beret and incendiary speeches, Mr Guterres was the anti-independence movement's figurehead and was accused of leading murderous rampages during East Timor's blood-soaked transition to nationhood.
Mr Guterres was found guilty by Indonesia's courts of crimes against humanity, but then later acquitted. He has been pursuing a parliamentary seat ever since.
The final tally of the vote for the national parliament confirmed that President Susilo Bambang Yudhoyono's Democrat Party almost tripled its vote and secured the largest share of seats.
It also highlighted the chaotic organisation of a poll where millions of eligible voters were left off rolls, the wrong ballot papers were sent to districts and many had a poor understanding of how to cast their votes properly.
Almost 50 million Indonesians were either unable to vote or failed to turn up, while another 17.5 million voted incorrectly. At almost 40 per cent of registered voters, this so-called "golput" vote was easily the highest in Indonesia's decade of democracy.
Indonesia will vote for its president in July. The deadline for candidates to nominate expires on Saturday.
In the latest development, President Yudhoyono has made overtures to his long-time rival Megawati Soekarnoputri to support his presidential bid. Two weeks ago, Ms Soekarnoputri launched a "grand coalition" opposing the incumbent."
well, bugger me!
....
Voters reject terror of Timor
Tom Allard, Jakarta
May 12, 2009
EURICO Guterres, the pro-integration militia leader who terrorised East Timor as it voted for independence, has failed to win a seat in Indonesia's Parliament.
Mr Guterres' failure to get the lucrative sinecure as West Timor's representative was confirmed at the weekend with the release of the final results of April's legislative elections.
"Because he is a famous figure, it was hard for him," said a member of Mr Guterres' campaign team, Hukman Reny, comparing him to Brazilian soccer player Ronaldinho.
"Just like Ronaldinho, whenever he plays, all the backs try to stop him scoring," he said.
With his long hair, beret and incendiary speeches, Mr Guterres was the anti-independence movement's figurehead and was accused of leading murderous rampages during East Timor's blood-soaked transition to nationhood.
Mr Guterres was found guilty by Indonesia's courts of crimes against humanity, but then later acquitted. He has been pursuing a parliamentary seat ever since.
The final tally of the vote for the national parliament confirmed that President Susilo Bambang Yudhoyono's Democrat Party almost tripled its vote and secured the largest share of seats.
It also highlighted the chaotic organisation of a poll where millions of eligible voters were left off rolls, the wrong ballot papers were sent to districts and many had a poor understanding of how to cast their votes properly.
Almost 50 million Indonesians were either unable to vote or failed to turn up, while another 17.5 million voted incorrectly. At almost 40 per cent of registered voters, this so-called "golput" vote was easily the highest in Indonesia's decade of democracy.
Indonesia will vote for its president in July. The deadline for candidates to nominate expires on Saturday.
In the latest development, President Yudhoyono has made overtures to his long-time rival Megawati Soekarnoputri to support his presidential bid. Two weeks ago, Ms Soekarnoputri launched a "grand coalition" opposing the incumbent."
well, bugger me!
....
Friday, 24 April 2009
A Very Good Cause
“In her shoes productions” proudly premiers the long awaited….
The PROCEEDS: The Vagina Monologues is performed around the world and each group performing donates a percentage of revenue from ticket sales to V-Day: a movement which benefits non-government organisations that work to stop all forms of violence against women…across the world. This year 10% Of V-Day campaign revenue will be donated to an organisation in the Democratic Republic of the Congo working to heal female victims of sexual violence. ******************************************************************************************Please note: V-day Timor-Leste will be donating 90% of revenue from ticket sales and donations to Casa Vida, a safe house offering treatment and refuge to female victims of sexual violence in Timor-Leste. Booking information: Tickets are $15.00 each and are going fast!! Please RSVP ASAP to secure your tickets by contacting:Lucy Kaval at vdaydili@hotmail.com or call her at +670-7472194
….
THE VAGINA MONOLOGUES a play by Eve Ensler
When: Tuesday 28th and Wednesday 29th of April 2009
Where: at MOTION in Dili
Doors open @7.30pm show to start @8.00pm sharp
Where: at MOTION in Dili
Doors open @7.30pm show to start @8.00pm sharp
(non-reserved seating- to be finished by 10pm)
About the MONOLOGUES : The smash-hit phenomenon that is The VaginaMonologues is soon to premier in Dili for the first time.. Based on interviews conducted with women from around the world, this poignant, hilariously witty and moving collection of tales gives voice to a chorus of lusty, outrageous, brave and thoroughly human stories. The Vagina Monologues is a celebration of female sexuality in all its complexity and mystery. An award-winning masterpiece giving voice to real women's deepest fantasies and fears, guaranteeing that no one who sees the show will ever look at a woman's body, or think of sex, in quite the same way again.
******************************************************The PROCEEDS: The Vagina Monologues is performed around the world and each group performing donates a percentage of revenue from ticket sales to V-Day: a movement which benefits non-government organisations that work to stop all forms of violence against women…across the world. This year 10% Of V-Day campaign revenue will be donated to an organisation in the Democratic Republic of the Congo working to heal female victims of sexual violence. ******************************************************************************************Please note: V-day Timor-Leste will be donating 90% of revenue from ticket sales and donations to Casa Vida, a safe house offering treatment and refuge to female victims of sexual violence in Timor-Leste. Booking information: Tickets are $15.00 each and are going fast!! Please RSVP ASAP to secure your tickets by contacting:Lucy Kaval at vdaydili@hotmail.com or call her at +670-7472194
….
Thursday, 16 April 2009
Lunch?
The new Nautilus Waterfront restaurant is now open for lunch. Hooray!
The pasta dishes are, as usual, superb. Mrs Sod had the Linguine alla Puttanesca and declared
it ab. fab.
The kitchen is open from noon. Nautilus is on the Beach Road, about 50metres east of Hotel Esplanada.
Treat yourself.
....
The pasta dishes are, as usual, superb. Mrs Sod had the Linguine alla Puttanesca and declared
it ab. fab.
The kitchen is open from noon. Nautilus is on the Beach Road, about 50metres east of Hotel Esplanada.
Treat yourself.
....
Monday, 6 April 2009
Liberal Democracy?
Been Raped? Victim of incest? Gonna die whilst giving birth?
Well, HARD LUCK!
"Draft abortion laws dropped in East Timor
Last Updated: Sat, 4 Apr 2009 13:35:00 +1100
East Timor's government has dropped an article from the draft penal code that decriminalised abortion for victims of sexual violence or incest following pressure from Catholic lobby groups.The first draft of East Timor's penal code was announced by the government last year. It decriminalised abortion for women if the pregnancy would put their mental or physical health at risk, or if they were victims of sexual violence or incest.The AMP coalition government has now dropped the second set of exceptions.Alita Verdial from the Alola Foundation says the decision may mean sexual violence victims will continue to have unsafe abortions."How about women like this - with the specific case like this - they can also have access to the health services".The penal code is expected be passed by the President soon."
Well, HARD LUCK!
"Draft abortion laws dropped in East Timor
Last Updated: Sat, 4 Apr 2009 13:35:00 +1100
East Timor's government has dropped an article from the draft penal code that decriminalised abortion for victims of sexual violence or incest following pressure from Catholic lobby groups.The first draft of East Timor's penal code was announced by the government last year. It decriminalised abortion for women if the pregnancy would put their mental or physical health at risk, or if they were victims of sexual violence or incest.The AMP coalition government has now dropped the second set of exceptions.Alita Verdial from the Alola Foundation says the decision may mean sexual violence victims will continue to have unsafe abortions."How about women like this - with the specific case like this - they can also have access to the health services".The penal code is expected be passed by the President soon."
OINSA KARIK O HANESAN IHA NIA FATIN?
....
Tuesday, 24 March 2009
Police News
Anyone who says that East Timor is turning into a police state should be put up against a wall
and shot!!
.........
Check out my good friends blog over at this link
......
and shot!!
.........
Check out my good friends blog over at this link
......
Saturday, 20 December 2008
Something Rotten in the State of Denmark?
Friday, 19 December 2008
Fantastic ET
Media Release: 19.12.08
Timor a Global Hotspot for Whales and Dolphins
A recent major scientific field survey has revealed the deep oceans off the fledgling nation of Timor-Leste are proving to be a global hotspot and major migratory corridor for whales and dolphins.
The project is a joint partnership involving the Government of Timor-Leste Ministry of Agriculture and Fisheries (MAF), the Department of Natural Resources, Environment, The Arts and Sport (NRETAS) and the Australian Institute of Marine Science (AIMS), and was the first ocean-going scientific research trip undertaken by researchers from the Northern Territory and Timor-Leste.
AIMS Project Leader Dr Mark Meekan said the survey was the first major boat-based survey of cetaceans (whales and dolphins) in Timor-Leste and follows six months of intensive aerial surveys of marine wildlife including whales, dolphins, rays, sharks, turtles and crocodiles along Timor coasts by NRETAS, AIMS and Timorese researchers.
NRETAS marine biodiversity Principal Scientist Professor Karen Edyvane said the survey recorded more than 1,000 individuals in eight separate pods over a mere 50km stretch of coast in a single day of observations.
"This is among the highest level of cetacean abundance ever recorded," Professor Edyvane said.
"Not only has the trip revealed the amazing cetacean abundance and diversity of Timor-Leste, but it also demonstrates Timor-Leste’s interest in marine science and its strong commitment to protecting and managing its unique marine biodiversity."
Territory and Timorese observers, including NRETAS marine wildlife experts Ray Chatto and Dr Kiki Dethmers, and Timorese researcher Jose Monteiro identified approximately 10 species of cetaceans, including Blue whales, Beaked whales, Short-finned Pilot whales, Melon Headed whales and six species of dolphins including Risso’s dolphin, Fraser’s dolphin, Spotted dolphin, Rough-toothed dolphin, Spinner dolphin and the Bottlenose dolphin.
"The dolphins and small whales were literally jumping out of the water all around us – it was hard to know which animal to photograph," Mr Monteiro said.
"It is vital that Timor-Leste continues this important scientific research to gain a better understanding of these magnificent but sensitive creatures and ensure that these cetacean populations are properly protected."
Professor Edyvane said one day in particular, with glass-like sea conditions, pods of over 300-400 individuals were recorded by observers.
"We were all amazed to see such an abundance, diversity and density of cetaceans," she said.
"The seasonal east-west migration of the large whales confirms what several cetologists have long suspected – that the deep oceanic waters off Timor, along the Wetar and Ombai Strait, is a major migratory route between the Pacific and Indian Ocean for marine wildlife."
Unlike many ocean scientific voyages in Australia, the survey in Timor was conducted aboard a traditional 20 metre wooden Indonesian vessel, the Timor Tiger Рthe first vessel in Timor to be registered for scientific marine research. Caf̩ e Floressta Agricultura Pescas Loro Matan Department of Natural Resources, Environment, The Arts and Sport Anne Marshall Ph. 8999 4730 www.nt.gov.au/nreta
"The Timor Tiger was a great research vessel for cetacean observations – multi-level, viewing platforms and local Timorese crew and observers that could spot animals at great distances," Professor Edyvane said.
Mr Celestino Barreto de Cunha, Director of Fisheries Management with Timor’s Ministry of Agriculture and Fisheries said that the discovery was indeed very exciting for Timor-Leste but it also presented many challenges.
"The Government of Timor-Leste recognises the enormous potential for marine ecotourism along its coast and will proceed very carefully in the development of this industry," Mr Barreto de Cunha said.
"We are committed to ensuring that this marine biodiversity is protected and we will continue to look to Australia to provide good scientific advice on developing a sustainable marine ecotourism industry and in particular, through our unique collaboration with marine researchers from the Northern Territory."
The survey was funded by the Government of Timor-Leste Ministry of Agriculture and Fisheries (MAF) and are part of an ongoing program of coastal and marine conservation, research, monitoring and training projects being undertaken by Northern Territory and Timor-Leste researchers including NRETAS, AIMS, Charles Darwin University and Timor-Leste MAF scientists, with a view to developing sustainable marine industries and much needed regional employment and economic development.
To view the images of the recent cetacean survey in Timor-Leste go to www.nt.gov.au/marine and select East Timor Whale and Dolphin Survey.
For more information on the Government of Timor-Leste Ministry of Agriculture and Fisheries go to http://www.maf.gov.tl/
For some great pictures go to this link:
http://www.nt.gov.au/nreta/wildlife/marine/timorsurvey/images.html
....
Timor a Global Hotspot for Whales and Dolphins
A recent major scientific field survey has revealed the deep oceans off the fledgling nation of Timor-Leste are proving to be a global hotspot and major migratory corridor for whales and dolphins.
The project is a joint partnership involving the Government of Timor-Leste Ministry of Agriculture and Fisheries (MAF), the Department of Natural Resources, Environment, The Arts and Sport (NRETAS) and the Australian Institute of Marine Science (AIMS), and was the first ocean-going scientific research trip undertaken by researchers from the Northern Territory and Timor-Leste.
AIMS Project Leader Dr Mark Meekan said the survey was the first major boat-based survey of cetaceans (whales and dolphins) in Timor-Leste and follows six months of intensive aerial surveys of marine wildlife including whales, dolphins, rays, sharks, turtles and crocodiles along Timor coasts by NRETAS, AIMS and Timorese researchers.
NRETAS marine biodiversity Principal Scientist Professor Karen Edyvane said the survey recorded more than 1,000 individuals in eight separate pods over a mere 50km stretch of coast in a single day of observations.
"This is among the highest level of cetacean abundance ever recorded," Professor Edyvane said.
"Not only has the trip revealed the amazing cetacean abundance and diversity of Timor-Leste, but it also demonstrates Timor-Leste’s interest in marine science and its strong commitment to protecting and managing its unique marine biodiversity."
Territory and Timorese observers, including NRETAS marine wildlife experts Ray Chatto and Dr Kiki Dethmers, and Timorese researcher Jose Monteiro identified approximately 10 species of cetaceans, including Blue whales, Beaked whales, Short-finned Pilot whales, Melon Headed whales and six species of dolphins including Risso’s dolphin, Fraser’s dolphin, Spotted dolphin, Rough-toothed dolphin, Spinner dolphin and the Bottlenose dolphin.
"The dolphins and small whales were literally jumping out of the water all around us – it was hard to know which animal to photograph," Mr Monteiro said.
"It is vital that Timor-Leste continues this important scientific research to gain a better understanding of these magnificent but sensitive creatures and ensure that these cetacean populations are properly protected."
Professor Edyvane said one day in particular, with glass-like sea conditions, pods of over 300-400 individuals were recorded by observers.
"We were all amazed to see such an abundance, diversity and density of cetaceans," she said.
"The seasonal east-west migration of the large whales confirms what several cetologists have long suspected – that the deep oceanic waters off Timor, along the Wetar and Ombai Strait, is a major migratory route between the Pacific and Indian Ocean for marine wildlife."
Unlike many ocean scientific voyages in Australia, the survey in Timor was conducted aboard a traditional 20 metre wooden Indonesian vessel, the Timor Tiger Рthe first vessel in Timor to be registered for scientific marine research. Caf̩ e Floressta Agricultura Pescas Loro Matan Department of Natural Resources, Environment, The Arts and Sport Anne Marshall Ph. 8999 4730 www.nt.gov.au/nreta
"The Timor Tiger was a great research vessel for cetacean observations – multi-level, viewing platforms and local Timorese crew and observers that could spot animals at great distances," Professor Edyvane said.
Mr Celestino Barreto de Cunha, Director of Fisheries Management with Timor’s Ministry of Agriculture and Fisheries said that the discovery was indeed very exciting for Timor-Leste but it also presented many challenges.
"The Government of Timor-Leste recognises the enormous potential for marine ecotourism along its coast and will proceed very carefully in the development of this industry," Mr Barreto de Cunha said.
"We are committed to ensuring that this marine biodiversity is protected and we will continue to look to Australia to provide good scientific advice on developing a sustainable marine ecotourism industry and in particular, through our unique collaboration with marine researchers from the Northern Territory."
The survey was funded by the Government of Timor-Leste Ministry of Agriculture and Fisheries (MAF) and are part of an ongoing program of coastal and marine conservation, research, monitoring and training projects being undertaken by Northern Territory and Timor-Leste researchers including NRETAS, AIMS, Charles Darwin University and Timor-Leste MAF scientists, with a view to developing sustainable marine industries and much needed regional employment and economic development.
To view the images of the recent cetacean survey in Timor-Leste go to www.nt.gov.au/marine and select East Timor Whale and Dolphin Survey.
For more information on the Government of Timor-Leste Ministry of Agriculture and Fisheries go to http://www.maf.gov.tl/
For some great pictures go to this link:
http://www.nt.gov.au/nreta/wildlife/marine/timorsurvey/images.html
....
Friday, 7 November 2008
Whale Of A Time
On Wednesday I was lucky enough to be asked to go up in a very light aircraft and take pictures of ‘Mega Fauna’ in East Timor waters. Mega Fauna basically means anything bigger than, and including, turtles.
What a day!
We took off from Dili Airport at 0620 and before we had reached our cruising altitude of 500feet and 80mph (yep, the ‘plane was that small) we had spotted a big whale right off of the Jesus statue. Picture below. We basically flew the coast of East Timor from Dili to Jaco heading east then along the south coast heading west then when we got parallel with Same flew inland to west of Dili and then east again along the coast to Dili. Total flying time about 4 hours. Very hard on the bum and no way to stretch your legs but who cared?
We saw at least 6 species of whales, easily over 4000 dolphins, manta rays in formation, BIG hammerhead sharks cruising on the surface and we just stopped counting the turtles once we got to Com and beyond because there were too many.
We also got pictures of some illegal fishing boats from Indonesia which we have handed on to the appropriate authorities with times, name of vessel, location etc.
I knew we had great marine life here but I never knew it was so prolific. The two scientists I was with told me that it was an absolutely exceptional survey. And when a scientist starts to use long adjectives you know you’ve seen something special!!
What a day!
We took off from Dili Airport at 0620 and before we had reached our cruising altitude of 500feet and 80mph (yep, the ‘plane was that small) we had spotted a big whale right off of the Jesus statue. Picture below. We basically flew the coast of East Timor from Dili to Jaco heading east then along the south coast heading west then when we got parallel with Same flew inland to west of Dili and then east again along the coast to Dili. Total flying time about 4 hours. Very hard on the bum and no way to stretch your legs but who cared?
We saw at least 6 species of whales, easily over 4000 dolphins, manta rays in formation, BIG hammerhead sharks cruising on the surface and we just stopped counting the turtles once we got to Com and beyond because there were too many.
We also got pictures of some illegal fishing boats from Indonesia which we have handed on to the appropriate authorities with times, name of vessel, location etc.
I knew we had great marine life here but I never knew it was so prolific. The two scientists I was with told me that it was an absolutely exceptional survey. And when a scientist starts to use long adjectives you know you’ve seen something special!!
Speaking of whales, does the Japanese ambassador really need to have 2 UNPol cars and 2 PNTL motorcycle outriders, with all the bells and whistles going, just to pop down the shops for a packet of durries and a 6 pack of Kirin on a quiet Saturday afternoon on the beach road?
After all, that's my tax money being spent. And I don't like it.
....
Saturday, 13 September 2008
Cane Toads? Load of Arse.
So, we are being invaded by Australian cane toads are we? Buffo bullshit I call it. No one yet has actually caught one of the said toads and presented it to any experts for inspection so far as I am aware. But what do we have? Some individuals have said we have cane toads here and that they 'stowed away' on INTERFET vehicles in 1999 to get here. So everyone and his ill informed son are jumping on the Buffo bullshit bandwagon. Even Senator Bob Brown in Australia has called for an 'extermination programme' to wipe out the toads that havn't yet been proved to be here. Senator Brown even sent me an email this morning trying to confirm that cane toads are here. I think this was in response to an email I sent him regarding his unsubstantiated comments. Even our beloved President, once again, has jumped on the Buffo bullshit bandwagon. Dear Mr. President, if you don't listen to your media advisors, maybe it's about time you did. And if you DO listen to them, maybe it's about time you sacked them. Or get them, and you, to read this link.
A cane toad (without the hat). Have you seen one of these Mr. President?
....
ps - if it is proved that there are indeed cand toads here I will donate USD 100.00 to any
local Timorese NGO.
Saturday, 28 June 2008
Fantasy Jobs
In the current spirit of ‘just making things up’ I’ve decided NOT to take the job of Angelina Jollie’s next lover even though I wasn’t offered it. I’ve also decided not to remember that is was me who first mentioned a heap of money in a Darwin bank account and then decided to forget that too. Oh yeah, I’ve also decided not to remember the name of the guy who shot me even though I have mentioned it and met him since.
But don’t quote me on any of the above…
ps - All journalists are untrustworthy and stupid
….
But don’t quote me on any of the above…
ps - All journalists are untrustworthy and stupid
….
Thursday, 26 June 2008
Turtle News
So, its 2.30am, I’m fast asleep and gently dribbling on my pillow. Suddenly the ‘phone rings, it’s my mate Bill (or is it Ben) “Mate mate, you’ve gotta get up now. I’ve got a turtle in the back of the car and we need to set it free”. Bugger.
Up I get, find the Maglite and await Ben (or is it Bill?) He pulls up about 5 minutes later, bottle of XXXX Gold in hand and I hear a furious thrashing from the back of his car. He has indeed got a turtle. A Green Turtle. And the bloody thing weighs about 80kg. He had been driving home through Dili when he saw three guys dragging the turtle through the streets. Apparently they had found it laying eggs, on a capital city beach mind you, and had just picked the thing up to take home and eat. Now Bill (or was it Ben?) is not a stupid man, far from it. He knows that to buy live turtles is only to encourage the capture and sale of the animals. He is also a sentimental bugger with some very rough edges. The guys demanded 50dollars for the turtle but my mate and his very tough girlfriend bargained them down to 15dollars. He couldn’t help himself and I don’t blame him. I would have done the same.
We take the turtle out of the car and carry it over the road to the beach, which isn’t an easy job because the turtle is big and heavy and thrashing around like a, well like a very distressed big turtle. We put it on the beach and it races off to the shoreline and dives in. No more turtle and hopefully it has survived the ordeal. And not even a backward glance to say thanks, ungrateful bugger.
When we were carrying the thing to the beach I made sure the head was pointing away from me because a few years ago I had a similar experience with a Hawksbill turtle. Thinking I would try not to spook it I carried it backwards with the head pointing towards me. Big mistake. Just before I got to the shoreline its head popped out and he/she (probably a she) gave me an almighty bite in the guts. Now that was very amusing for the guys in the pub watching, the pom got gut bit! Ha bloody ha. But I ended up with a bruise the size of a dinner plate and I was passing blood for the next 4 days. Not very nice, but the turtle lived. So, if ever you have to rescue a turtle, carry it so that the ungrateful buggers cannot give you a friendly nip.
….
Up I get, find the Maglite and await Ben (or is it Bill?) He pulls up about 5 minutes later, bottle of XXXX Gold in hand and I hear a furious thrashing from the back of his car. He has indeed got a turtle. A Green Turtle. And the bloody thing weighs about 80kg. He had been driving home through Dili when he saw three guys dragging the turtle through the streets. Apparently they had found it laying eggs, on a capital city beach mind you, and had just picked the thing up to take home and eat. Now Bill (or was it Ben?) is not a stupid man, far from it. He knows that to buy live turtles is only to encourage the capture and sale of the animals. He is also a sentimental bugger with some very rough edges. The guys demanded 50dollars for the turtle but my mate and his very tough girlfriend bargained them down to 15dollars. He couldn’t help himself and I don’t blame him. I would have done the same.
We take the turtle out of the car and carry it over the road to the beach, which isn’t an easy job because the turtle is big and heavy and thrashing around like a, well like a very distressed big turtle. We put it on the beach and it races off to the shoreline and dives in. No more turtle and hopefully it has survived the ordeal. And not even a backward glance to say thanks, ungrateful bugger.
When we were carrying the thing to the beach I made sure the head was pointing away from me because a few years ago I had a similar experience with a Hawksbill turtle. Thinking I would try not to spook it I carried it backwards with the head pointing towards me. Big mistake. Just before I got to the shoreline its head popped out and he/she (probably a she) gave me an almighty bite in the guts. Now that was very amusing for the guys in the pub watching, the pom got gut bit! Ha bloody ha. But I ended up with a bruise the size of a dinner plate and I was passing blood for the next 4 days. Not very nice, but the turtle lived. So, if ever you have to rescue a turtle, carry it so that the ungrateful buggers cannot give you a friendly nip.
….
Friday, 20 June 2008
Shipping News
We've all seen the monstrosity pictured below. Its a clapped out Indonesian sailing boat which has been sitting on Dili's only slipway for more than 2 years now. Boat owners and operators find it very difficult to get their vessels in and out of the water since this pile of rotting junk has been parked there. Wouldn't it be a magnanimous gesture by the well placed and not cash poor owner/s of this disgusting pile of trash to donate it to say, some of the many Timorese carpenters in town so something useful can be done with it? Instead of creating a public inconvenience. Oh, it stinks as well because its also being used as a public convenience.
An Indonesian Junk?
....
Sunday, 4 May 2008
More Odds N Sods
Anonymous
Some of you may have noticed that I have recently started to moderate the comments section of this blog. This is because I have been receiving a number of comments recently from ‘Anonymous’ (you know who you are, you little tinker) that are full of racist, homophobic and frankly fatoldsodist comments. Now whilst I believe in freedom of expression I do think the onus is on the commentator to make sure the comment is coherent, legible, spelled correctly and grammatically precise. So, Anonymous, I promise to publish the first comment you send that fulfils the above criteria, no matter what the content. You fuckwit.
Electricity
This morning we had our first power cut in months. It lasted about 30 minutes and was of no consequence as we have a generator. I know from friends that we are very very lucky with our electricity as they are having constant cuts in different areas of town. The main reason, I have always suspected, that we are this lucky is because we live on the same street as most of the Embassies in town and nobody wants to upset the donor countries.
Now the other night I was talking to a chap down the pub, as you do, who is over here to help run and maintain the power station in Comoro. Among other things he told me that they have had a directive (no names, no pack drill) that certain areas of Dili should never have cuts. One of these areas contains the house just west of the Jardin IDP camp and Hotel Timor where certain rebels are being contained. You know the one. Its got a big sheet of blue plastic around it, 4 million air-conditioning units, satellite dishes, a pool table and a contingent of heavily armed PNTL and F-FDTL guarding it. Apparently this particular house must not receive any cuts.
Now imagine if you were a law abiding Dili citizen.You pay for your electricity in advance, which you probably will not receive (a breach of contract if ever I saw one) and yet you know that ‘rebels’ in a safe house are never sweaty, have constant light, can put the karaoke machine on whenever they feel like it, the fridge has nice cold drinks in it and that they are safe and sound with their own personal bodyguards to protect them.
If I was that law abiding Dili citizen I would be well fucked off.
Cooking News
I was recently leafing through an old cookery book and came across the following recipe. I thought it might be of interest to my reader.
DILI-CON-CARNARGE
SERVES APPROX 1 MILLION
INGREDIENTS
300g (11 oz) of Incompetent Governance (IG)
150g (5.5 oz) of Unmitigated Nonchalance (UN)
1 very very small tbsp of transparency
A heavy dollop of mixed bleeding hearts
1 large slice (approx 5 weeks) of religious interference
600 petitioners
30 cloves of rebels (crushed)
An overwhelming amount of Pork and Cheese
1000’s of barrels of oil
Leaks
1 bag of mixed nuts
No rice
PREPERATION
Ideally this dish should be prepared using an electric oven but in consideration of the previous article a Timor gas oven should be used.
Place your 1000’s of barrels of oil in a pan and bring to the boil. Add your 300g of IG, 150g of UN and your mixed bleeding hearts. All of these should have been well pickled beforehand. After waiting 4 years add your large slice of religious interference. Let the whole lot simmer for approx. 5 weeks. When the dish begins to smell add your 600 petitioners. After 2 months the petitioners should have wrung out the IG. (A new IG can be voted in later). Once this is accomplished throw in your 30 rebels. These can be crushed after 2 years. Stir in your mixed nuts and your leaks. When the mixture starts to smell like a dead rat take your tbsp of transparency and throw it away. You won’t need it. Stir well, cover-up and cook until everyone forgets the previous 6 years. Season the whole mixture with hypocrisy and cynicism and serve on a large bed of Pork and Cheese.
….
Some of you may have noticed that I have recently started to moderate the comments section of this blog. This is because I have been receiving a number of comments recently from ‘Anonymous’ (you know who you are, you little tinker) that are full of racist, homophobic and frankly fatoldsodist comments. Now whilst I believe in freedom of expression I do think the onus is on the commentator to make sure the comment is coherent, legible, spelled correctly and grammatically precise. So, Anonymous, I promise to publish the first comment you send that fulfils the above criteria, no matter what the content. You fuckwit.
Electricity
This morning we had our first power cut in months. It lasted about 30 minutes and was of no consequence as we have a generator. I know from friends that we are very very lucky with our electricity as they are having constant cuts in different areas of town. The main reason, I have always suspected, that we are this lucky is because we live on the same street as most of the Embassies in town and nobody wants to upset the donor countries.
Now the other night I was talking to a chap down the pub, as you do, who is over here to help run and maintain the power station in Comoro. Among other things he told me that they have had a directive (no names, no pack drill) that certain areas of Dili should never have cuts. One of these areas contains the house just west of the Jardin IDP camp and Hotel Timor where certain rebels are being contained. You know the one. Its got a big sheet of blue plastic around it, 4 million air-conditioning units, satellite dishes, a pool table and a contingent of heavily armed PNTL and F-FDTL guarding it. Apparently this particular house must not receive any cuts.
Now imagine if you were a law abiding Dili citizen.You pay for your electricity in advance, which you probably will not receive (a breach of contract if ever I saw one) and yet you know that ‘rebels’ in a safe house are never sweaty, have constant light, can put the karaoke machine on whenever they feel like it, the fridge has nice cold drinks in it and that they are safe and sound with their own personal bodyguards to protect them.
If I was that law abiding Dili citizen I would be well fucked off.
Cooking News
I was recently leafing through an old cookery book and came across the following recipe. I thought it might be of interest to my reader.
DILI-CON-CARNARGE
SERVES APPROX 1 MILLION
INGREDIENTS
300g (11 oz) of Incompetent Governance (IG)
150g (5.5 oz) of Unmitigated Nonchalance (UN)
1 very very small tbsp of transparency
A heavy dollop of mixed bleeding hearts
1 large slice (approx 5 weeks) of religious interference
600 petitioners
30 cloves of rebels (crushed)
An overwhelming amount of Pork and Cheese
1000’s of barrels of oil
Leaks
1 bag of mixed nuts
No rice
PREPERATION
Ideally this dish should be prepared using an electric oven but in consideration of the previous article a Timor gas oven should be used.
Place your 1000’s of barrels of oil in a pan and bring to the boil. Add your 300g of IG, 150g of UN and your mixed bleeding hearts. All of these should have been well pickled beforehand. After waiting 4 years add your large slice of religious interference. Let the whole lot simmer for approx. 5 weeks. When the dish begins to smell add your 600 petitioners. After 2 months the petitioners should have wrung out the IG. (A new IG can be voted in later). Once this is accomplished throw in your 30 rebels. These can be crushed after 2 years. Stir in your mixed nuts and your leaks. When the mixture starts to smell like a dead rat take your tbsp of transparency and throw it away. You won’t need it. Stir well, cover-up and cook until everyone forgets the previous 6 years. Season the whole mixture with hypocrisy and cynicism and serve on a large bed of Pork and Cheese.
….
Tuesday, 29 April 2008
Mea Culpa
In the current climate of forgiveness and “least said, soonest mended” I have decided to offer an amnesty AND a pardon to the poor misguided armed chaps who burgled my house on December 24th. I realise now that the only way forward is to suffer from a selective amnesia and forget all about justice.
So chaps, I hope you spent the money you stole on alcohol, drugs and loose women and didn’t just squander it. I hope the booze you stole didn’t give you all too big a hang over. That you and yours wear the cloth’s you stole with pride, after having used the iron you stole to make sure they look nice. That the tools, flash-lights, binoculars etc were all up to standard and suited your needs. That you got a good price for these items when you sold them in the Comoro market.
Also in this spirit of “a new beginning” I have put all my old locks back in place so that the keys you stole will now gain you unlimited access to my house so you won’t have to drug the dogs to get in.
I also hope that when/if you are arrested (ha!) you refer to the amnesty given to Rogerio Lobato and 80 other convicted criminals and basically say “If it’s alright for them it should be alright for us”.
Maybe we can arrange a “dialogue” or a “workshop” or a “consultation” to resolve any issues we may have. Myself and a few of my mates would love to have a “dialogue” with you so that we can all see the error of our ways.
Talking Of Which
A very nice PNTL officer who is in charge of my burglary case came round the other day with some ID photo’s of guys he suspects may have been involved. He asked me if I recognised any of them and had I seen them hanging around the house on the day in question. After perusing the pictures I had to tell him that I didn’t in fact recognise anyone. This was due to the black-eyes, bleeding noses and general bruising that would have made it hard for their mothers to know them. I gently suggested to the police officer that maybe they should take the ID photo’s before they give the suspects a bashing. He took this on board and said it was a very good idea.
Another triumph for public/police relations.
....
So chaps, I hope you spent the money you stole on alcohol, drugs and loose women and didn’t just squander it. I hope the booze you stole didn’t give you all too big a hang over. That you and yours wear the cloth’s you stole with pride, after having used the iron you stole to make sure they look nice. That the tools, flash-lights, binoculars etc were all up to standard and suited your needs. That you got a good price for these items when you sold them in the Comoro market.
Also in this spirit of “a new beginning” I have put all my old locks back in place so that the keys you stole will now gain you unlimited access to my house so you won’t have to drug the dogs to get in.
I also hope that when/if you are arrested (ha!) you refer to the amnesty given to Rogerio Lobato and 80 other convicted criminals and basically say “If it’s alright for them it should be alright for us”.
Maybe we can arrange a “dialogue” or a “workshop” or a “consultation” to resolve any issues we may have. Myself and a few of my mates would love to have a “dialogue” with you so that we can all see the error of our ways.
Talking Of Which
A very nice PNTL officer who is in charge of my burglary case came round the other day with some ID photo’s of guys he suspects may have been involved. He asked me if I recognised any of them and had I seen them hanging around the house on the day in question. After perusing the pictures I had to tell him that I didn’t in fact recognise anyone. This was due to the black-eyes, bleeding noses and general bruising that would have made it hard for their mothers to know them. I gently suggested to the police officer that maybe they should take the ID photo’s before they give the suspects a bashing. He took this on board and said it was a very good idea.
Another triumph for public/police relations.
....
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